Presidential Candidates

It's just a couple months until I may or may not see presidential candidates in Iowa. I think at last count there are 27. With that many, just walking down the street would give you pretty good odds of bumping into one. But they all clump up in Iowa soon. That is because of the Iowa Caucus. Not sure when or even what it is, except I know its a pretty big deal to these guys. I shouldn't say guys as there are women running. The women (i.e., longshots) should be there too. They seem OK, but they aren't going to get elected. Part of the problem is that someone running has to be somewhere between nice and mean. For women, I think that window is a lot narrower. On the nice (1) to mean-spirited (10) scale, women have to land maybe in the 4.5 to 5.5 range. Men could be anywhere from 3 to 7. (By the way, I'm basing this on nothing except it has just popped into my head.) Elizabeth Warren seems like an 8. The blonde haired lady, about a 2. Buttereig (sp?), a 1. Biden seems like a 4. Obama, a 3. Trump is a 12.

But good politicians hide who they really are a lot of the time, so I guess its hard to tell. Its also tough to tell because I've pretty much quite watching the news. But in person I'll be able to tell. Then I can inform you how to vote. You're welcome.

Maybe a good test will be putting mustard on my corn dog and I accidently squirt each candidate and see how they react. Buttereig - "Don't worry about it, we're all family". Trump - "Get him, boys". I think I'll learn some stuff from my mustard test.

I hope this gives me an idea who to vote for. Last time I didn't like anybody and wrote in my buddy, Dick Nixon (a 20). There was a possibility I was throwing away my vote with that move, but I didn't want to vote for someone I didn't want and I would feel guilty not voting. What is really sad is it seems like these folks have been running for a long time already. We still have like a year and a half until the election. Buckle up, America.